I see something in the corner of my eye, but when I turn around there's nothing there. Maybe I've finally fallen asleep. But I can't b sure, can I?

Close my eyes I close my eyes and try try try to drift away. On a cloud, 2 a place where time doesn't exist and everyone I know is still alive.

Yesterday @ the Marmont: met beautiful ppl. Black traded (someone else's) olives for cigarettes and drank maybe ten vodka tonics.

*

Everything should be all shimmery, but I’ve had a strange feeling with Black lately. When I ask her something that has to do with reality she just changes the subject. What happened when I was away?

Since the day she threw grain on my window this weird dream has been haunting me: Me and Black, in some sort of video game world, dressed as samurais. Neon purple buildings, roofs shaped as Kremlin in Moscow. But I know that we're in Prague. From nowhere the bicycle ppl from the Wizard of Oz appear and start hunting us down. We're climbing the streetlight cables, balancing on tiny strings. It's night, the rain falls and all of a sudden, Black slips...

Last night I woke up and found myself sitting wedged in the corner of my room. Aloysius noticed. Sat with me the rest of the night and held my hand. Dried my tears.

*

Now I'm seeing HER through the window, dressed in granny's old Kenzo kimono. An odd expression on her face, looking as beautiful as ever.

Dress: Mom's old Celine 

I've been dreaming about the fields of my hometown in Karelia lately. Huge green fields under an empty summer sky.
In this first dream I was walking my neighbours dog. A huge black Doberman.

The dog was strong and wild and I could barely hold her as she dragged me by the leash through the damp grass and the poppy flowers. But as soon as I let go of the leash she would instantly stop, return to my feet and sit down quietly like a true lapdog.

After a while I understand she wants to tell me something. I follow her to this willow tree with bent old branches (I hadn't noticed the tree before, although it's right in the middle of the field.)
As soon as we're there she starts climbing the branches, higher and higher and I follow her through the thick green and the world dissapears under us. Suddenly we're right under the sky and I can see EVERYTHING from here but as I turn to the dog to thank her for showing me this she suddenly jumps of her branch and dissapears into the clouds beneath.

When I return to the neighbour with an empty leash and tell him what has happened he looks confused and points at the sofa where the dog is lying, sleeping.
I look down on my hands and notice that there’s no leash. Then I wake up.